We are often reminded that the sun will only shine in a way that can support life way out here on the earth for only about another five billion years. Sensing the eventuality of the cataclysm, we’re easily inclined to express our concern, along with our sympathetic distress for those far-off folks who will be … Read more
Noting the way violent and irrational Muslims have dominated the news, while the peace loving Muslim masses and, most inexcusably, Muslim clerics have in general remained reticent about the scandalously murderous terrorist talk and the mayhem the lunatics advocate, we decided there must be, among the world’s billion or so Muslims, any number of normal, … Read more
As you know, an Italian man has challenged the Catholic Church to prove that Christ existed, and, while the case was, somewhat expectedly, tossed out in an Italian court, the plaintiff, undaunted, found a court in Strasbourg that has agreed to hear it. It remains to be revealed who the Catholic Church will designate to … Read more
Did you ever notice that we’re surrounded by information but hardly ever come across an idea in the mass media that might help us lead sane and happy lives? Oh, not the usual self-help drivel about how to lose weight or enjoy sex, but answers to the really big questions, like what to think about … Read more
Being a movie buff with smiling memories of Jimmy Cagney, Joey, more in debt than usual, found himself in a familiar role. So come out with your checkbook open. “Joey, do you hear me?” the customer service rep called through a bullhorn. “This is Verizon.” “Whaddaya want?” Joey called back. “This is a final disconnect … Read more
Due to a revolutionary procedure; the sex change procedure, an entirely new species of human is now afoot on the earth – neither all male nor all female. And people who have undergone the procedure seem delighted. A mostly female member of the species confided, “When you become a new species, it changes your whole … Read more
“How did it happen,” the intern asked, “a tramautic emotional event, a knock on the head?” to the man loses memory. “No, no, nothing like that,” the businessman replied, taking out his PDA. “You see, I keep everything in my electronic organizer. At first, it was a convenience. Then, over time, I became dependent on … Read more
“This place is amazing,” Todd told Lila, the topless CPA dancer who had just charged him for touching her hand. “Is there anything you don’t charge for?” “Not very many,” she joked. “How’d it get that way?” he wanted to know. “It was started by a dancer who saved up and got her CPA.” Todd, … Read more
While Marco Polo, a Venetian, is generally given credit for discovering noodles in China, recent research suggests that Italian pasta in all its glorious varieties was actually discovered in Rome nearly a century earlier, and quite by accident, by a remarkably unlikely epicurean named Julius Amplonius, with the able assistance of an invading barbarian named … Read more
Look far and wide, and what do we see? The most civilized nations, at least, the ones we’ve got at this point in our nascent human development, having made an uneasy accommodation to behavior that they would historically wretch at as downright repellent. This is the new code of Hammurabi. It’s none other than the … Read more